Hello, I'm curious about certain behaviors I have perceived from others. At times I have become aware of apparent attempts to trigger a behavior response in me set up by people around me. While this is similar "Gaslighting", in my experience the intent is different. I'm referring to people who seem to think they can gain real insight into a persons character by developing scenarios, often with the help of others, that they can then point to and say, "I was right" you have such-and-such deficiency.

What I'm looking for here is real knowledge about how to handle such behavior without simply reacting, giving the person/persons an action to point too which in their view, proves the original hypothesis.

I'd prefer not to hear opinion about the appropriateness of the behavior itself.

Thanks in advance.